How to tell your kids about your divorce

Divorce is hard enough on adults, and it can be even harder on kids. While it is important to tell your children about the decision to split, there are better ways to do it than others. If handled correctly, there will usually be less of an emotional and long-term impact if you keep certain tips in mind.

Get along

According to, the first thing parents should do is put aside their hard feelings and anger towards each other. Showing your kids a united front helps them see that their parents are able to work together when it comes to what is best for the children. While your kids do not need to know exactly why the divorce is happening, they do deserve, and want to know, a reason. Avoid blaming the other parent and provide a general justification.

Reassure your child

One important message to get across during this time is that the split is not the fault of any of the children. Reassure them of this and demonstrate unconditional love. Some kids will have questions right away, while others need time to digest the information. Give them the time they need.

Listen and respond to their questions

According to, children will react to the news in various ways. Some may act as if nothing is wrong, while others may be sad, angry or withdrawn. As they work through their emotions and adjust to the news, there will be many questions. Be open to all inquiries and have specific answers for what they want to know, even if the answer is “I don’t know.” Understand that your kids assume their parents will always be together, and it is crushing to realize that is not the case. 

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